It’s race day in T – 10 hours. I should probably be asleep.
I went for a little practice run again last night – 3k at a slow steady jog so I didn’t exhaust myself. I have to say that I felt pretty good during the run, and absolutely fantastic afterwards. I can see how people get addicted to this exercise business!
I’ve been reading a blog called Bucket List Publications (one of these days I’ll write a Bucket List, or a Mighty Girl-style Life List. It’s totally on my to-do list…), and I was struck by how often the author carried out an idea or plan shortly after hatching it.
For me, deciding to do this charity run was a totally spur of the moment decision, and it’s been fantastic. I’ve raised nearly £100 for a cause I care strongly about in under a week, I’ve found a new focus and motivation for getting off my arse, and ridiculous as it sounds, I’ve spent the week on a rollercoaster of apprehension, anticipation, fear, excitement and self-doubt, and ultimately self-confidence.
Contrast that with my intention to do a PhD and become a lecturer, an idea I hatched nearly four years ago and which got off to such an excellent start with my MA. Funnily enough it has involved much the same range of emotions, but increasingly spiralling into apprehension and self-doubt.
If my initial schedule had gone to plan, I would have gone straight from Masters to PhD, and be finishing my doctorate in a year’s time. Instead I procrastinated, postponed, prevaricated, and now I find myself at a point where I want to travel, study, buy a house, have an awesome career and start a family ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Aaaand that all got a little too heavy too quickly. Point is, sometimes spontaneity pays. And sometimes you just need to go to bed and get some sleep before the big race.